The Bride and The Bridegroom

Hello everyone.
I think this is going to be a tough post so sit down, buckle in, and get ready for some movement in this place.

So, for those of you who do not know, I love the bachelor and the bachelorette. Like really love these two shows. They sometimes feel like my Christmas given that I usually have a countdown to each new season and I keep a close eye on social media for any spoilers. I have an opinion on almost every contestant and if you were to ask me after the first episode, I'd probably have my guess of who I thought was going to win. (As a side note, in every season I have watched, my episode one pick has been in the top three...not to brag or anything...I just thought you should know). What I especially love about this show is how each new bachelor and bachelorette has such a different personality from the previous ones. But for some reason, this season's bachelorette--Hannah--has stolen my heart. She is the definition of a strong woman who is well-spoken and stands up for what she believes in. She's the kind of woman I would like to be friends with.

On the most recent episode, they gave a quick "coming up on this season of the bachelorette..." and then a sneak-peek of the rest of the episodes. There was one scene where Hannah was speaking to a man (whose face we couldn't see) and she was rather upset with him. She was explaining to him what she believes about sex and then, what kind of decisions she had made in the past regarding sex. Her exact words were "I believe sex is for a man and a woman inside marriage" ...oof. She then goes on to say something along the lines of "the mistakes I have made in the past do not change how I feel about sex [I imagine she meant keeping it inside the covenant of marriage] and guess what...God loves me despite my mistakes." Double oof. What a woman. Hearing something like this on a show where sex is talked about so casually honestly felt like a breath of fresh air.

However, after hearing this comment from Hannah, I realized that recently, I've been having quite a few conversations regarding this very topic: sex outside of marriage. I recently sat down with a close friend of mine and over a cup of coffee, she opened up to me about some sexual sin in her past. A different friend also opened up to me about her past as we sat at a local restaurant and munched on some chips and salsa. My most recent conversation was actually as I was hiking with someone and we were chatting about her soon-to-be boyfriend and how he had a sexual past and she was having a hard time coming to terms with it. These are all conversations in which I believe the person needed to hear exactly what Hannah said on the show: despite the mistakes, Jesus loves anyway. So let me tell you three of my favorite stories for this conversation.

Obviously, the first thing that comes to my mind when thinking about this topic is Rahab. I say "obviously" because she has been my favorite story in the Bible since I was in middle school so it's pretty common for me to take things back to Rahab. But this conversation lines up perfectly with this woman's story and I am just excited to talk about her again. For those of you who do not know, the story of Rahab can be found in the book of Joshua and to sum it up as quickly as possible: Rahab was the owner of a brothel and likely a prostitute when she was approached by Israelite spies in the city of Jericho. The spies asked for housing and without hesitation, Rahab hid the spies and saved their lives. Because of this, she and her family were saved as Jericho was defeated and she was later found in the line of Jesus. Now, hold this thought and let me call another story to your attention.

Our next story takes place long before Rahab and that is the story of Abraham, Hagar, and Sarah. This story is in the book of Genesis and for another quick recap: Abraham and Sarah were married and they were very old (past child-birthing age, as they say). The two prayed for a kiddo and the Lord came to them and said He would provide. However, Sarah was doubtful asked Abraham to sleep with her maid, Hagar. From this, Hagar had a son named Ishmael. Years later, the Lord kept his promise and Sarah became pregnant and had a son named Isaac. Isaac later had a son named Jacob who then bore the twelve tribes of Isreal (this is a very big deal). Next.

The last story I want to mention is the story of David and Bathsheba. This is the story of King David who saw a woman bathing on the roof who--mind you--was married. He called her down from the roof and slept with her. David's guilt ate him alive, he murdered Bathsheba's husband, and she gave birth to David's child who just so happened to be Solomon: the wisest man to exist and the man who built the Lord's temple.

So, it's easy to see that these stories all have two major things in common: sexual sin and redemption. In all three of these stories, the two topics go hand-in-hand. We continuously see how the "but then..." is monumental and it shapes the entire old testament (and even new testament) stories. So where am I going with this because it's a long post. Here we are: no amount of sexual sin is going to hinder the Lord's plan. Let me repeat myself: no amount of sexual sin can hinder the Lord's plan for your life: He is victorious. I could scream this from the mountaintops and still not truly get my point across. In each conversation I had, my friends showed concern for their own or their partner's walk with the Lord in response to these decisions. They were worried that the Lord wouldn't forgive them and that the promise of a happy marriage and family would be severed because of the choices they had made. Every single time I wish I could point them back to these three stories and remind them of the Lord's already-established victory and the promises that were previously fulfilled even in the worst of sexual-sin-circumstances.

This is where things get sticky and I need to call this to your attention. I wish with everything that I am that I could leave the post at this but that wouldn't be fair to either of us. So let me say now that just because you are forgiven doesn't mean that you should continue to live in this sin. In each story, the people let the Lord do His work and they were blessed. Every. Single. Person. Repented and allowed the Lord to work. This is where we can also learn. We shouldn't continue to live in sin when we know the weight of what is to come...when we remember the promise and allow the Lord to fulfill it.

So let me close this longggg post by saying this: we are all constantly being redeemed. YOU are being redeemed. You are His bride dressed in white, my sweet friend. The Lord is pulling you out of your mess and redeeming you so you may be presented before him on the holy wedding day dressed in white and cleansed of all of your sin, your shame, and your pain. And until the wedding day, He is fulfilling that promise to do so. You are so deeply loved by your bridegroom...you are so deeply forgiven. So however the Lord wants you to internalize that--let it be what drives your relationships. If it is your own sexual sin: let the promise redeem you. If it is your partner's sexual sin: let it redeem the both of you. The weight of your sin will never (and I mean never) outweigh the gift of grace and the promise of redemption. You are made new even in the midst of the sin that you believe is unforgivable and you are called into glory. So let that be your lifeline; let that be the reason you love and forgive.

Amen,
Syd.

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